A Birthday Request

On the eve of what would be my dad's 62nd birthday, I find myself sitting on the couch watching a home video from December 1986. I would've been 3 months old at the time and my twin and I are being passed around the table from person to person. My sisters and cousin are playing with the game SIMON trying to remember the increasingly complicated patterns. My mom is in and out of the kitchen in her baggy shirt and large 80s glasses. My dad sits at the table with a big, bushy mustache and a full mop of hair atop his head. Grandma (Aunt) Marge is proudly showing off her "Grandma Marge" sweatshirt happily explain that all of the grandkids names are on it with "Andy's being somewhere up here." All of this being filmed with a video camera the size of a 10 pound baby.

It is the picture of happiness. The family is all there and everyone is happy and together. Political strife hasn't driven its wedge between opposing parties within the family and all the people I love are there. These were the good old days (even if I only remember them from videos).

I completely realize that I am a glutton for punishment by watching these videos, especially today. Today when I miss my daddy dearly and yearn for what should have been. I also realize that I am *really* lucky to have these videos so that I can still hear his voice, however painful that is.

Fast forward a few minutes in this sadly blurry video and I hear my dad behind the camera calling. "Carolyn! Caro-lynne-poo! Kevie! Kev Kev Kev Kevie! Carolyn! Caro-lynee-poo!" As he tries to get us to look at the camera.  Something he will never do with my children.

Fast forward a bit more to a scene when mom is feeding me with her right hand while shaking a container of wipes with the other to keep my attention. She is speaking to Grandma Marge and lamenting the fact that if she told Caitlin and Kristen to nap they wouldn't, but if Gary did they would go right up and go to sleep. All of this in the midst of a conversation about Dynasty and the magazine "National Star".

My dad was a good great man . He was a man that was taken too God-damned soon from all of us, but he was a great man. He was a man who was focused on helping others even if it meant massive frustration on his part. He wanted to change things for the better and help everyone he possibly could. He was involved in organizations whose sole focus was to help bring those into nature would couldn't go on their own. He wanted to help others and spread kindness until the very end. He led a life filled with acts of kindness.

Ultimately, I don't know who reads this blog ... but my mom has put out a request and I am requesting the same ... tomorrow, in honor of his birthday let's spread those seeds of kindness far and wide. Do something nice for someone else. Give someone a hug who needs it. Do a random act of kindness for which you receive nothing except the satisfaction of knowing you did good. It is the little things that often have the largest impact. Not sure what to do? Look here for some ideas. So if you are reading, spread those seeds and be kind to one another.

Fab As I Am

I am a teacher of a lovely group of fourth graders and every year I look at them and wonder how I can support them in being body positive and having a high self-esteem. Every year I find myself coming up short.

How can we counteract what the media and Hollywood have worked so tirelessly to create as our norm? How can we counteract what our young people believe when we struggle on the daily with our own body image and self-esteem? How can we counteract all of the photoshopped photos and impossible beauty standards that are thrown in their faces Every.Single.Day.?

We are living in a world where young people (both boys and girls) make comments like, "Oh, she's the fat singer!" when someone mentions the song All About That Bass. Or they make fun of each other for not wearing designer clothes and shoes. They make fun of girls for having small chests and of boys for having small muscles. They make fun of girls for not having a thigh gap and of boys for not being tall enough.

Why? 

Because we have bought into the impossible expectations that are set in front of us and we accept them blindly. We don't question whether it is right or wrong ... we just say okay and follow it up with some fad diet, weight lifting, or worse - we move in the terrifying direction of eating disorders.

What we don't do (but should!) is recognize our own beautiful, fabulous selves. We should recognize that our worth is not tied to our outward beauty but to who we are as people - how beautiful we are on the inside. We should recognize that we need to plant seeds of kindness and lift others up rather than tear them down. We should recognize that our outward beauty IS beautiful. We should recognize the power of our brain and the strength in our soul. We should recognize that WE ARE ENOUGH. We are beautiful, incredible, fabulous people regardless of what the media believes is "beautiful". You is kind. You is smart. You is important. You is enough.

An amazing friend of my family recently started a movement on Facebook that is meant to empower all people to realize just how important they are. We need to act as positive role models for each other. So I encourage you to join the revolution and make a post on Facebook, Twitter or your own blogs about just how fabulous you are! Use the hashtag #fabasiam (Fab As I Am) on your posts so that we can all see just how fabulous you are and bask in your greatness with you. When fabulous calls makes sure you pick up the phone.

Fab As I Am - Day 1 Post

I too love my eyes. They are the part of physical me that is most complicated. They like to change color depending on the day (light blue, vibrant blue, greenish) which I think is pretty cool. They are also pretty vibrant - someone once told me they were "electric". They also are the source of my tears which tend to flow easily which I believe makes me strong not weak. ‪#‎fabasiam‬