Let's Make a Deal .... Or Not

The whole idea of dating is terrifying. It becomes even more terrifying when you have a blind date with someone you met online. But online or not the whole process of dating someone can be exhilarating, terrifying, exciting, disappointing and all the other -ings you can imagine. But the ultimate goal of dating someone is to find someone to marry, yes?

I mean not if you are going out with Wants-Only-Casual-Dating-Guy or Check-Out-My-Abs-Guy then I guess you just want casual dating, whatever that means. But, for most of us that are playing the dating game ... we are ultimately looking for someone to spend the rest of our lives with. We are desperately looking for our future husband.

(Or wife! sorry if there are any male readers out there! By the way ... are you single?)

That's a huge commitment. Like one of the biggest decisions you'll ever make commitments. (I guess that's why guys are so terrified of commitment.)

When in the dating game, most people have a pre-determined set of "deal-breakers" that they consult before giving the nod of approval to some random dude. I mean he could end up as your future husband so you'd better be okay with all of his habits before you say yes to the dress.

The whole concept of deal breakers is really interesting. They are a set of things that we absolutely-positively-without-a-doubt cannot live with things that we are looking for in a partner. We try not to have a terrible long list of deal breakers because let's face it, nobody is perfect. But there are always things that we cannot live without.

For me, my deal breakers consist of:
(1) not wanting kids - this is not a question for me. I will be mother some day come hell or high water I will make that happen. If you don't want kids or there is even a chance of you not wanting kids, then you need not apply.
(2) political beliefs - this never used to be a deal-breaker for me...but time's have changed and I can't spend the rest of my life with someone who supports a candidate who is working against everything I believe to be right
(3) drugs - of any kind ... this includes illegal drugs as well as nicotine addictions

Of course I have some hopes for a future partner (taller than me please!) but those are my only 3 deal breakers. The whole concept becomes trickier as you get older and the dating pool gets exceptionally smaller.

You join the online dating pool and you look and look and look but don't see much to your liking. Then finally you find someone you think you would like to meet and a big flashing light pops up when you find out they don't want kids. Do you throw out your deal breaker?

You see people finding love all around you. Engagements, births, new relationships. Hell, even the volcano in a Pixar short finds love against all odds after sinking into the ocean and resurfacing with a lovely she-volcano by its side. Do you throw out your deal breaker?

You think that maybe it would be okay to have someone who supports an opposite political belief than you because there is an overwhelming amount of them ... maybe it isn't a big deal. You just don't talk about politics, right? Do you throw out your deal breaker?

But that's the thing ... they are a deal breaker for a reason. There might be a saying about throwing all caution to the wind ... but maybe in this case you keep the caution tape up and proceed slowly with your life jacket on as you wade through the pool or opportunity.

The State of Teaching

Fair warning ... this post will focus on the downward spiral that is the teaching profession. So if you are a republican supporting, Scott Walker loving, hating public education kinda person ... you can stop reading now. Or better yet, please do read on. Read on and open your eyes to the travesty that is happening in what used to be a great, great state.

A statement released today by the Department of Public Instruction said that, "The legislation being rolled into the biennial budget would require the Department of Public Instruction to license anyone with a bachelor’s degree in any subject to teach English, social studies, mathematics, and science. The only requirement is that a public school or school district or a private choice school determines that the individual is proficient and has relevant experience in each subject they teach."

So. Wait. Let me get this straight. In the state of Wisconsin anybody with a bachelor's degree would receive a teaching license? Anybody? It doesn't even matter what their bachelor's degree is in, they would be licensed to teach English, social studies, math and science?

Someone please tell me, how does having a Bachelor's degree in Business Management gives you the appropriate credentials to teach common core mathematics to a bunch of fourth graders? Please, tell me how a Bachelor's in Business Management is going to help you teach the multiplication place value sections area model to a student who comes from a low income family and can't afford to eat breakfast?

By this logic, I am qualified to do all sorts of things with my life. I have a Bachelor's degree in Education so clearly I am qualified to work in other fields as long as I have relevant experience.
I have flown in a plane and therefore I am qualified to fly a plane.
I have cooked food and therefore I am qualified to be a top chef in a fancy restaurant.
I have sung along to the radio and therefore know that millions of people who like to hear me sing.
I have driven a car and therefore can be the Chief Executive of Automobile Safety.

Right?

Now what do they consider 'relevant experience' in the field? If they aren't required to have a degree in teaching and take courses in each of those subject areas ... where do they receive the relevant experience? Is it enough to have sat through math classes during elementary school - does that count as experience? Where is the line drawn?

On the flip side of this ... we are treating our teachers who have a valid, hard earned teaching license as if they are the scum of the earth. Teachers are required to undergo the Educator Effectiveness evaluation system. The system where we look teachers square in the face and say, "You Suck. Now prove you don't."

Even in the justice system we say that people are innocent until proven guilty. We give them the benefit of the doubt and allow them to state their claim. Yet, we don't give educators the benefit of the doubt. I'm not saying that we don't need an evaluation system. We just need a refined one where we differentiate what teachers are asked to prove. We shouldn't tell all educators that they suck and then ask them to spend 20+ hours to prove their worth to 'the man'. 20+ hours where they could be working on activities that they could use with their students.

I don't know if I know the answers to solve these problems. But I do know that we are not doing right by our students. We are not supporting the teachers who work hard and sometimes even give their lives to support their students. We need to keep qualified educators in the classroom.

Something has got to change or the state of our state will continue to burrow deeper into the mud.